I can do hard things

Tonight T and I had the wonderful and amazing chance to hear Elizabeth Smart speak at my YSA stakes fireside. Two weeks ago, our bishop announced that she was coming to speak and I nearly gasped out loud because I was so excited. 

If you don't remember, Elizabeth Smart is the girl who was kidnapped at knifepoint by a man who broke into her house and stole her from her bed as she slept. She was held captive for 9 months and was repeatedly raped, tortured, starved, and more atrocities. 

The thing that I love about her is that after this horrific ordeal, her testimony remained strong and unshaken. No one would have blamed her if she no longer believed in God because of the horrible things she went though. She went on to serve a full-time mission for the LDS Church. She gave up 18 months of her life to serve the Lord. 

The first thing that struck me when she walked into the chapel and sat up on the stand was how poised she was. The chapel was over flowing with people, so much so that they opened up the culture hall behind and people were sitting on the stage. They even had to roll a tv into another room and video tape it because there were so many people. Sister Smart didn't bat an eye at the crowd. She was smiling, laughing, and talking to the family that was on the stand with her. 

One of her companions who had served with her in France and also lived in Utah introduced her. Sister Smart got up and began to speak. Her voice didn't waver once.

 She told the story of her captor and how he grew up. She told us about being stalked for 8 months, taken from her bed, and lived under constant threat of abuse and death for nine months. She reminded us that we are all children of God and that what was happening to her was not her fault. Even though her captor constantly used religion as a way to manipulate and justify his actions, she didn't loose faith. 

She spoke of the Atonement. How it healed her and allowed her to move on. She knew that there was someone that knew exactly how she felt. Christ went through what she went through. I gained a better appreciation and understanding hearing her talk about the wonderful blessings that come from the Atonement. 

After her talk, the audience was allowed to ask questions. Some were funny (How is dating? "Messy. Stressful. Normal" was her answer) Some were touching and testimony strengthening (Did your testimony suffer during or after your ordeal? "No." Simply 'no'.) My personal favorite was when she asked what she was afraid of after going through this ordeal, she answered that she was afraid of snakes and spiders. :)

I walked away with a greater appreciation of life. Anything that I am going through pales in comparison of what that little 14-year-old went though. Her faith never wavered and she went though things that are unimaginable. Even though religion was used to justify her captors motives, she knew it was wrong. She knew that God loved her and wouldn't command anyone, even a so called "man of god", to intentionally make someone do something they do not want to do. 

No matter what the affliction is, you can make it through. You CAN do hard things even if you don't think you can.  At the very end she shared her favorite scripture that got her through so much: 

"Be patient in afflictions, for thou shalt have many; but endure them, for, lo, I am with thee, even unto the end of thy days."

D&C 24:8

be thankful

Being thankful is something that sometimes gets tossed by the wayside and only remembered and vocalized around November when families get together to eat themselves into a food coma and watch endless hours of bad football (okay, the bad football part is only if you're a Detroit Lions fan.)

Remember those annoying '25 random things about me' note post thing that everyone was doing on Facebook a few years ago? I did it. It's a way of discovering things about yourself, but at the same time it's a bit narcissistic don't you think?

I was sitting on the couch tonight in a bored stupor from being stuck inside all day thanks to my strep and suddenly I just had this feeling of great thanks. I can't explain where it came from but I suddenly realized how truly blessed I am. I admit that I am one of those people that sometimes forgets how truly lucky and blessed I am. Sometimes, it takes a tradgedy to realize how good you have it. Sometimes, it takes being surrounded by family all day and eating all day to realize that. And sometimes, all it takes is a snoring puppy, a Book of Mormon sitting on your coffee table, and the air conditioning humming keeping you cool to make you realize how truly lucky you are. 

Tonight I decided to make a list of things that I am thankful for. 

1. My entire family. No matter how crazy, loud, overbearing the might be. They're my family and they're everything to me.

2. My dog Charlie. He's kept me sane and grounded for the past two years. I know it's silly to rely so much on a dog, but he is my guardian angel. 

3. My friends. I've met so many wonderful people through blogging and consider them to be part of my inner circle of friends. I also have some of the greatest friends that aren't online and they mean the world to me too. 

4. My testimony. It's been a long time coming, but I finally found where I belong and feel at home. I don't always nourish it like I should and it's still growing day by day, but I know in my heart my testimony is true and strong. Finally. 

5. My mom. She is my rock. My support system. I couldn't do anything without her. She is the most generous, loving, caring, kind person I have ever known. She puts me and my sister above her happiness and if I'm even half the mother to my kids as she is to us, I think I'll have done a pretty good job. 

6. My baby sister. She is also my rock and support system. I'd be lost without her. She makes me laugh despite my tears. She always knows how to cheer me up or when to just be there for me. She is the calm one when I go into one of my melodramatic episodes. She balances me like no one else. 

7. My upbringing. I have led a privileged life that, I'm ashamed to say I sometimes take for granted. The opportunities that have been given to me are beyond measure and I am who I am today because of how I was raised. 

8. T. T gets his own number. T has taught me so many things in the short time I've known him. He's taught me that there are guys out there with hearts of gold. He's taught me I am worthy of being loved. He's taught me what a good relationship looks and feels like. I've had some pretty nasty relationships that had all but destroyed my faith but he's restored that faith. He is the best guy a girl could ever ask for. 

9. Technology. This goes without saying. Without technology, it would be impossible to skype with my mom for over an hour while she's thousands of miles away. It would have been impossible to meet T without technology. 

10. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I already touched on my testimony, but I am also thankful for these two men in my life. I haven't always been close with them or even wanted them around but they stayed, waiting for the perfect time to bring me back into their presence. 

11. Modern medicine. Without modern medicine, I would probably not be able to have children or even see my 50th birthday. 

12. The Pioneers. I look up to these heros so much. Their struggle and journey to the west keeps me inspired and going when I think I've made the wrong decision. 

13. Prayer. I'm learning to be prayerful always. I don't always do it 'right' but I try as hard as I can.

14. The Atonement. He died for me even if I don't come close to deserving it. 

15. Utah. Another weird one, but I finally feel at home here.

I was going to round it off at a nice 15 things but I remembered one more:

16. My life. My entire existence on this planet. I am so happy that I chose to come to earth to be tested and tried and to prove myself to Heavenly Father.  

At 22 years old, I have finally found my place in this world and feel like the next chapter of my life is beginning. I couldn't be more thankful.

(image source)